不要来！

傻妹驾到！

我是傻妹，傻妹是我，名副其实的傻妹加kampung妹，总结起来就是傻傻的我！哈哈哈！

我是傻妹。。。这名字很适合我。。

傻妹病了。。。是活该的。。。

傻妹放弃了原有的幸福，目的为了追求所谓的“一片天”，所谓的“前途”，伤害了对傻妹最好的人。。。

傻妹病了。。。现在傻妹得靠自己照顾自己，不能再依赖他，是时候放下过去。。。因为傻妹伤害了他。。。全是傻妹的错。。。不知应否继续自责。。。那是傻妹的错。。。

傻妹啊，傻妹。。。现在的傻妹只想一个人。。。不要靠近傻妹！靠近傻妹是一种罪过！傻妹只想要一个人的生活。。。

該面對還是要面對。。。

生活在傻妹的世界。。。其實也蠻好的。。。不想理太多。。。理太多反而愛管閑事。。。不理就不理。。。傻妹萬歲！

不管人家如何看待我，我只知道我對別人好，我不串。。。我做好自己該做的事。。。對得起我自己。。。這就足夠。。。

現在的我，不理別的事，只管自己以后的前途。。。只知道，現在不努力。。。以后什么都沒了。。。

說我悲觀嗎？我不這么認為。。。

傻妹！駕到！

最進發生了很多事。。。只知道很氣。。。就是氣！

我不說什么不代表我不知道。。。

我沉默寡言，不代表我是啞巴。。。

啞巴也有眼睛。。。

有些話不用說到這么絕。。。

有些動作不用那么刻意。。

選擇當傻妹。。。不想被這么多東西困擾。。。

做好我的本分就好。。。

吃麥當勞最好！！

我的手机被偷了！

一切发生得太突然了。。。没人能预料到此事件的发生。。。当时的我虽然没表露出一丝慌张。。。可是，若这种事情发生在你身上，你能不慌吗？你能不紧张吗？你会不伤心吗？

无法相信，我现在已没了电话。为何会那么倒霉？虽然那电话不是很值钱，可是那毕竟是陪伴我两年的手机。。。对它的感情当然是浓厚的。。。里面有我收藏了一年多的信息。。。全都是我重要的回忆。。。里边的通讯录。。。都是我朋友们的电话。。。里面的照片，每一张都有不同的故事，提醒着我每一天每一夜。。。里边的video，收藏着我这两年来经历的每件事。。。现在，我才发觉它的好。。。只可惜，一切已经过去了。。。它～成了PAST TENSE。

为何就是我？！为何？！我现在有的钱并不多！！每天的三餐耗尽了不少钱。。。很快就会用完了。。。用完了就向家人要钱。。。我不喜欢这样！我想靠我自己！不想每天都向家人讨钱！每次都要厚脸皮！我自己也不想的！钱不够用也就算了！为何要发生这种事？！要我去哪里变一个电话出来！！

缺钱缺钱缺钱！现在的我，满脑子都是钱！为何会这样？！不是我想要的。。。这根本不是我想的！可惜，生活在缺钱的日子。。。真的是件煎熬。。。吃好的，喝好的。。。都是问题。。。我不想花家人那么多的钱。。。我不想造成他们的负担。。。！！可是，话是这么说。。。但很难做到！！一天的开销。。。真的会让你满脑子头痛。。。一个星期。。。两个星期。。。每天都得熬下去。。。功课一大堆。。。都很少机会能好好睡个觉。。。杯面也曾经是我每天必吃的食物。。。可是，现在看到杯面，我只有以“吐”来形容！！我真的吃不下杯面了! Mamak！！我也不要了！！可惜，有何选择？你不吃。。。就会肚子饿。。。到最后。。。你也得吃。。。T.T。。。

为何要在这时候不见手机？？我现在的经济状况根本无法让我立刻买架手机。。。只有靠工作。。。真的好倒霉好倒霉。。。我哭笑不得。。。没有手机的日子。。。这是我的第一天。。。但人生还得继续走下去。。。就当作一个经验，一次机会，让自己凭自己的努力买一架真正属于自己的手机！

Finally...blogging...

Finally, there's time for me to blog here. Chinese New Year keeps everyone busy yeah...part from that, I sort of forgetting the part that all humans only have one chance to choose what best in their lives. And once they've chosed what kinda life which suits them, there is no turning back. I repeat, NO TURNING BACK & NO REGRETS.

As far I know, people at my age nowadays are mostly blinded by the power of $$$...Of course, I have to admit that money really has the power turn your life UPSIDE DOWN or even changing what is good to bad...or changing other's decision...OF course, lots and lots of money you may have the chance to lead a happy lives! However, is it so?

Got married to a rich and wealthy guy...are every girl's dreams. However, if you were married to a wealthy guy who buy you lots of gifts you ever dreamed of ...lots of diamonds and jewelleries you ever wanted but loves other chicks and babes...I ask you seriously, DO YOU LIKE THIS KINDA LIFE?

Second Example:

Got married to some guy at my age or more just because of a "sudden incidences" , with no career and personalities, having no houses, cars or even own bank accounts...having kids later on...Let my tell you frankly, THIS WOULD JUST KILL YOUR KID'S FUTURE!! DO NOT MAKE RUSH DECISIONS LIKE THIS! Mostly cases like this would just end up divorce...which there's no happy endings after 2 to 3 years. Trust me, I've seen too much.

Third Example:

Got married before having a stable amount of $$ to spend would just makes you suffer later on! LOVE ?!! What is a marriage if they just got married cz of LOVE?! If they don't have enuf $$ to support their family later on, all of this would just be a disaster!!! JUST FORGET ANYTHING BOUT MARRIAGE IF YOU DON'T HAVE $$ to support your kids! DO NOT LET THEM SUFFER!

P/S : What I mean by being able to support your family is have the ability to feed them, buy them nice clothes , subscribe an education fund, insurance for the whole family, car, house, in order to ensure that they have nothing to worry for pursueing their studies later on!!!

WARNING :
GUYS : Think before you do something.
GIRLS : Too Think before you DID something awful to yourself!

( This is the power of $$...Please don't sue me...)

Happy Chinese New Year and my future....T.T

It's Chinese New year...meeting our relatives and telling them that I'm studying mass communication really makes them worry about my future. My mom kept telling me to go for Maktab Perguruan cz it will give me a more stable, a good living and of course , a DEGREE...

I admit...I was abit moved by what my mom told me...and I was worried bout my future too...am I going to live with Rm1000+ salary per month after I graduate? I will. Of course...I'm abit worry of my relationship too....will it last? cz he still haven hav a career or cert...wil it last long? I'm worry lots!

My new life in KL...

My new life in KL...It's interesting and Challenging!!

Let me volunteer to tell u a story about the life of a country girl ...

I still remembered when I first came here I was totally blurr...luckily I met great people in my life...My housemates, classmates and my ROOMMATE ( Iyeuki ).

( Pingu-pingu and Little Lin)

Oh ya, forget to tell you all about my new nickname...All of you can call me Little Lin or Xiao Lin too^^!! haiz...how I got this nickname? hmm...because there is also another Ee Ling in my class...so, she is Da Ling or Darling...and I'm Xiao Lin...^^!! Anyway, I love my new nickname..haha...cz it makes me even cutier than before!! Fuyoh~~~~~~~~~~!!

My life here is damn interesting and fun...thnx to our seniors and classmates!! They treat us real nice...and our classmates are so friendly!! That is y all of us could get along so fast in such little time!!

Lazy....continue nxt time ba...T.T

HAIYA!!!!!I TIBA CHERAS D!!!

Halo halo!!!I'm monashgirl!!^^nice to meet all of u guys!!

I TIBA CHERAS LO!!

Actually...i edi arrived here yesterday and lived here...hmm...since yesterday!!!IT's so cool man!!haha!!!

Wanna noe who am I??

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hahaha!!Blerk!!! lazy take pics jor...i bluff u de!! wakakakaka!!

anyway, I met a new fren here which is my roommate^^haha^^She's so nice n we got along well....hehe!!SYOKnya!!

hmm...oh ya!! I forget^^ nw it seems like I will always go leisure mall hang gai jor....cz the mall is jz opposite where i live...haha!!Damn near to the jambatan!!kaka...hey...dun simply think lar....go there buy daily stuffs , makanan and eat lunch ma!!aiyo, u can't aspect me to cook always?? tak da tenaga to walk tat far to buy stuffs u noe...anyway, I'm damn tired right now...jz finish bathing after whole day of cleaning job...and of course we cook our own meals^^ fish ball noodles with eggs!!^^ hmm...abit lazy to blog jor...k la...it's all for now...both of us r damn tired...and I'm looking forward for tmrw's ORIENTATION!!hehe!!Hope tat will be damn good n damn fun o!!

GAMBATHE EVERYONE!! I LOVE YA!!

FINAL Countdown...I'm going there anyway^^

THE FINAL COUNTDOWN

Hey, it's the "last day"(jz say oni lar...not real de...will come back de mar^^) for me in Sitiawan..Oh, I'll sure miss this town...^^...Firstly, I wanna thank my grandpa, grandma, daddy and mommy for being so considerate for letting me out to a foreign state to further my studies. And I appreciate very much for what they did for me^^I mean it for real!!! Besides, I really appreciate what he did for me too^^...I will sure misses the day with him ( jalan-jalan kat Giant with a trolley full of socks, utensils, gloves and all...hahaha!! )

Oh ya, not forgetting my friends' support^^ Thnx Doon for giving me the PINK TOWEL!!!I love it!!I like it so much!!THanks!!! And yet, not forgetting Yee Zing for teman me to go shopping whole afternoon and giving me tips on how to dress up!!!^^ THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!Thanks for being so encouraging and driving me to here and there just to buy my shoes!!! THANKS!!!THANKS!!!I WILL MISS ALL OF YOU!!!

And to my 2 little baby sister :

GAMBATHE IN YOUR STUDIES O!!! AND DUN MISS ME N DUN CRY ALWAYS!!!KAKAKAKA!!!

As for my new year resolution...hmm...It's still a secret for now...wakakaka!!Will tell all of you when i get to my new home!!^^ MUACKS!!!LOVE YA!!!

DAY 6...

COUNT DOWN : DAY 6

Woke up at 2pm and ... my normal days starts by watching tv prog... My dad took my mom and my baby sis to Taiping...so it's just me and ashlyn at home...Until...I got hungry and cook maggi mee by myself with a rice cooker ( practising it b4 leaving home )... hmm...a piece of advice from me , MAGGI MEE TASTE BEST IF YOU COOK WITH POTS AND PANS.

Hate to say that I'm actually falling sick these days...I wear my jacket even it's hot in the afternoon cz I'm feeling so cold!!! Mayb I'm sick already? haiz...I edi swallowed 4 tablets of vitamin C !!! I hope that I will be alright by saturday...really nid the strength u noe? ...
I also chit-chat with my grandma and show her my luggage back which I've finish packing d...( there's all food and daily stuffs...)

I miss HIM!!! T.T

The week before going to cheras...

This week...of course there's happy times and sad moments...I wish I could stay here longer enough...but longer enough isn't longer enough...Greed is in everyone's heart...Even if I got to stay here longer, I will wish to stay here for a even longer period!!!

We got to separate again...duh...I'm so sad...I know I'm kinda desperate to leave home for study...but who knows? Maybe I have a brighter future there?! However, I dislike the feeling of being far from my family, my partner and of course my friends.

COUNT DOWN FROM DAY 7 :

Ming Chong ( I manage to spell my bf's name correctly!!) helped me with my shopping list and we spend 2 hrs to buy all the things in my list at Giant...omg!! Walked here and there, finding the things and small containers so that it would be easier for me to bring soya sauce or other cooking materials to my NEW HOME...LOL...both of us were like two crazy people, pushing a trolley here and there...It was a moment that I wouldn't forget...and SURPRISE!!! We spent RM92.10 on buying groceries!!! He's so good to me...and sometimes I feel that I should care bout him more you see...yeah...I definitely will and I will sure miss him lots!!! And what makes me wanna cry is that...He helped me so muchy!! And he cares for me so muchy!! He kept asking me whether I missed any of the things in my list, and he even lend me his BESTA dictionary cz I couldn't afford to buy one...T.T!!!! I'm so touched....T.T!!

Back to my family :

I just hope that my dad and mom will stays together forever , always happy and smilling...especially my dad ( Stop marah people d!!) and my mom ( Keep on being cute ba!!)...As for my cat cat sister and my mousie sis...^^ Be good to each other and start STUDYING!!!

Frankly speaking, actually the person that I "Kan Cheong" most now is my mom...It is still hard for her to let my fly on my own wings...I know the fact that she cares for me and she will be missing me...even now it's 7 days before 'the day'...everytime we talked bout me leaving home to cheras she will be like hugging me and said that she misses me...Although I will definitely misses everyone but I still have to be strong and move on bcuz I know it's my destiny to fulfill my dream ...We only have one chance to live... I hope that my mom will be fine, my sisters will not be starving anymore ( cz i cooked for them most of the time )...my dad, he knows how to take care of himself...little brownie must be fat fat, my grandpa and grandma stays healthy always, my uncle and his family too stay healthy, my aunt also must stay healthy, my best friends all must stay healthy!! And last but not least, my dear must stay healthy and must pass your exam with flying colours o!!!^^

P/s : DO NOT LET THE FEAR STRIKES YOU, KEEPS YOU OUT OF THE GAME!!

What defines a simple life?

As I was watching Mama-Mia...I discovered what a simple life will be...Owning a villa of your own...managing...having a kid of your own...It's like a dream come true...although it's not really defines a simple life...

What defines a simple life? Having a soulmate? Spending a life side-by-side? AND ALL WITH IT COMES WITH $$$?! Who discover the term --> MONEY$$ Anyway?!!??!?!!

What I really wants was to have a nice family of my own...A gud career...although i'm not tat kind of a career person...but that was wat i nid to do right now since i'm just going 18!!! This is what i nid to do right now...and...there's no nid to worry bout me soulmate^^cz I've already found myself a Mr. Right^^ And I'm sure we'll be fine although my parents are abit worried of our future and my future life...^^

Hmm...A simple life for me will be like living a small cottage, cook and did everything on our own...^^...Decorating the house with all the things we like...sewing my kids some nice blankets, making tea in the evening, eating toast for breakfast!! It is such a wonderful dream for me!! Unlike others, I prefer travelling on budget trips...^^...Getting hotels or even HOMESTAY programmes...which i will have the chance to experience the local life and what the locals do everyday...I love it!! I certainly dream of it!!

Although I'm too young to think of any of these, but I'm sure....a gud life needs a gud planning...and that's what I will do now...I will run my life wisely^^!! WIsh me luck!!^^

And I hope You will help me as well^^...muacks!!

I just wanna express my love to PINK!!!I love PINK!!! There's the only colour I LOVE now and ever!!!

I love pink!! Hey everyone, have u all noticed that i've transformed my blog into pink city?! Hmm...I'm looking forward to transform my entire house into PINK HOUSE!! haha!!But it is impossible...hehehe!!It's my dream...omg...imagine...whole house was painted in pink...i wonder what my neighbours will be thinking of me? A maniac? A going hysterical person?! hahaha!!

Recently, I was thinking...what is the most important thing in our life? Money$$$?? or relationships such as family, friends and partner... I still cannot get the right answer yet...It's really a hard n tough question u noe?! Am I making the right decision of supporting my partner always until he gets a suitable career? Am I making the right decision of following my own dreams? What Am I thinking?! OMG...I'm getting a headache...T.T....But I just can't throw away the fact that I love him....Of course, he's not a bad person though...he treat me nicely, respect me, a non-smoking guy, non-gambling guy...Is that not enuf to make him a perfect guy for me? I just want a simple life...I hope that my wish will come true...which is....Bla bla bla bla...( It's a secret eh!! My own secret^^) Of course, for cancerians, family, friends and partner are always da first^^.

A Country Girl's Diary...^^

A country girl...this is wat I was and this town is wat I used to be..but things gotta change!! And it is time for a country girl like me to explore a city life...After thinking for quite some time, I probably need to get myself on my luggage bags, writing a list of what I should bring to KL, cleaning my ROOM!!! It's so...!!! I can't decide what to bring !! It's a heck of a list!!

Like what shows in the calendar...3/1/2009...It's just after 2 weeks...and after that I will be staying at kl...as I recall my childhood here in Sitiawan, I was so happy...wow...This is where i belong to...the place where i grow up...the place where i first noe hw to read ABC or say papa n mama^^or even 123...the place i started talking and recognise family and friendship...and the place which I met my partner...everything ...all of my memory belongs to here...

I love my family, my friends and my partner so much...Although I will be leaving here after 2 weeks...but i will cherish the moment of us being together...for so long time...although now it is time for me to bid farewell with all of you...Must be happy although we'll be separated after secondary school!!!!!I will always be thinking of u!!

My diary...friday till sunday...meaningful days^^

Finally I got the chance to meet him after waiting for a month...(unaware of wat i could be if i've to wait for him next year when he's in s'pore working...sob sob....) I was so happy that day...luckily i still manage to control my tears from rolling down from my cheeks...I hold his hand...and he holds mine...I felt i wanna cry...!!!
We went out eating McDonalds on that night...hehe!! After that, he send me back home...hahahaha!!cz its edi late night liao...nid to go back jor...blek^^XD

We went out again the next day morning...at 11.30am...We ate our breakfast and he took me to boutiques and buy me clothes...I'm so touched...but i noe...i can't keep spending his money...cz i noe he worked very hard to earn a living...so, i just picked two of the dresses instead of 4 although i like them all so much...^^THen, he bought himself a T-shirt and a belt for his grandma's birthday party!!cz she's 80 edi!!! After shopping for da whole day, i sang birthday song to him...and he opened the present i bought for him^^which is a pink T-shirt^^cz i love pink...so i bought it for him so he could remember me always^^hehe. That was da most meaningful day of my life!!! After that, i followed him to where his frens belanja makan...haha!!They eat so much...6-7 dishes for only 7 people...haha!!And our stomach was so full!!!However, I nid to buy a tiramisu cake for my sisters...cz i edi promised. So i went to Paris and buy it...but when i reached home..there was no one....!!!I was so mad!!We go round and round around my taman!!hahaa!!luckily he's my bf...if not i sure got scolded by him...then we rushed to Giant to giv my sis her CAKE!!!zzz...i was so mad...i keep mumbling all the way from Sitiawan to Giant...hahahaha!! then we rushed back to da cinema so tat we could buy ourself tickets for TRANSPORTER 3!!10.15pm!!hehe^^there we met our frens which is Vick Goh..hahaha!!I hardly recognised him..ehhe^^I got back home before 12.30am...hahaha!!And my grandpa was waiting for me...hahahaha!!

Today, I woke up exactly 11.15am...i called him...my bf jz wake up from sleep^^hehe!!lolx!!And his bro told him that his grandma's birthday celebration was at 1pm!!!!!!!!!zzz....he told me it was at 7pm...hahahahaha!!Then i rushed , bathed, put on my wardrobe, make ups....haiz!!I even have to wear high heels to make me taller...cz that's the only way...T.T...hahaha!!
We arrived at Ah Hing Restaurant...His mom and his families , relatives...and of course...his grandma^^ We greet her happy birthday and she gave us ang paus...(red packets)...And we sat on the table nearby...and i sat next to his mom^^hehe!!His family was so nice to me and keep telling me to eat and eat^^hehe!!And i met his cousin Kai Wen too^^She was so stylish and cute^^hehe...^^

T.T....Rain rain go away...haiz....Unfornately it started raining around 8pm...it was pouring...raining cats and dogs...Otherwise, he protect me from the rain with an umbrella^^hehe!!I'm so touched!!!Walking under the rain...it was so romantic...I will definitely remember today^^...Walking under the rain...side by side...T.T!!! And We oso got my necklace fixed!! After such a tired day, we went to KFC^^ and ordered ourselves 2 snack plate n a regular fries!!hehe!!And we talked and talked...without realising wat time it is...but...finally i got to go home...cz if i did not...my parents will be worrying sick of me...so...its time for me to get back...

I will definitely miss him alot after today...and tomorrow...and tomorrow...and tomorrow...!!!!
Need to wait a week more before we can meet again...T.T!!I miss him!!I really do!!!

Yeah!!Succeed!!!

I got it...I got accepted to the college...Yes!!!!!!!!!!YEAH!!!!!!!!I'm so happy!!!!!

Not knowing what my future is...I will continue and fight for my dream!!

I just can't stay here and do nothing...I will be flying after SPM!!Flying!!!Although its hard to "survive" at a foreign state, foreign town, n a foreign city...but its worth a try!!

ALL FOR ONE DREAM --->

FULFILLING MY DREAMS as being one of the background movie/drama/reality shows producing team!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Trial Result...I've improved...

I've improved in my trial result.
Although it's not much, but I got to keep it going because It's my ONLY HOPE!!

My Trial Result :

1. BM - A1
2. BI - A2
3. BC - C5
4. MA - C5
5. MT - 9G
6. EST - A1
7. ICT - B4
8. SN - B3
9. PM - A2
10. SJ - D7
11.AK - E8

I'm still far from my target, but At least I've improved!!Gambathe everyone!!!

Desperate, desperate and desperate...Stupid cocurriculum...Needed form 4 and form 5's marks again...real stupiak...why the Ministry got to put it so hard in everyone? Just get the marks from the clubs, that's all!!Why we need another record book to do it?! Waste time, energy and PAPER!!

4/10/2008..Left a day before school reopens...

Oh My GOSH!!! It's Saturday already...time passed so fast....I've wasted my "one-week" Holidays by being a sleep pig?! USELESS Man!!!

Anyway, if I count it properly...I still left 30+ days before the real SPM exam starts...It's all about revision, revision AND revision...ARGH!!!

Look back at my SPM Aims :

1. Pend. MOral - A1
2. BM - A2
3. BI - A1
4. BC - B3 or B4
5. EST - A2
6. MA- A1
7. MT - B4 or C5
8. AK - A2
9. ICT - A1
10. SN - A1
11. SJ - A1

(*ToTal = 9As)

Can I achieve it?
Will I achieve it?

NO!! I MUST ACHIEVE IT !!!
ITS IMPORTANT FOR ME TO ACHIEVE SCHOLARSHIPS!!

GAMBATHE!!!

25/9/2008....IS IT A TEMPORARILY BREAK?!

Is it a temporarily break for us Form 5s? I think not...

Addmaths is real tough...the standard is real high...I nearly fainted in the exam hall...Still, I was able to get myself through it...just kept on letting myself "fell in love" with MT!!!
However, I was not as good as others...I was so tensed...and even cried while doing MT...lolx!!I'm such a crying baby...I was not in a good mood that day...

Today, what I did was trying my best to get a PASS in MT...same as old days...It sucks!
I hate this feeling...I just hate it!! Why I just can't get a PASS in MT? Like everyone else? IS IT really so hard?? I just have to put more effort in it...

Despite that, I'm so happy now because he will come back to S'wan tomorrow!!hehe^^I could have a 2 days break anyway...try not to be stressed out^^...

SPM years were quite enjoying...It's only the result that scares people off...I just have to put in more effort in order to score in the exam...GAMBATHE guys n gals!!Especially my pals!!hehe^^

GAMBATHE TO ALL OF US!!!!

Follow my dreams or just leave it there??

What should I do?

Leave behind my dreams and just become a teacher for the entire life?!